Oh shit, that hurts

How for someone that loves and try’s to see the best in everyone still get it so so wrong?

Fourteen months ago I got back with the lad that was my first love. Anyway we went to a school friends funeral December 2014 together and ended getting back together, crazy as it sounds my last conversation with my deceased friend was about him. We’ve been to Goa, Bulgaria twice (his two brothers live out there) and cape vadel.

But as soon as returning only two weeks ago he there, spending two days doing her radiators, her is his ex girlfriend, who joins us at our table in the pub and I came to except her, well until I found out she was an ex.

On the Sunday after returning we popped to the shops and he bought me a heated blanket for my old bones, that night I went home and lay on my blanket which I thought was bought with love!!!!!

The Monday late morning I text to say my plumber had been and gone, but not heard from his lodger ( I passed the number on) to which I receive a text to say,” oh just at Mums Β got the fence paint, now going to K,s to do her radiators “. See he was a plumber by trade, and I paid for a plumber to come out!!

Yes I asked him to take a look twice to be correct ( god I wish I could spell) but in conversation over the last year he told me how one of his ex before used him to get things done!!!! So obviously asking a couple of times is enough, I’m not that way incline, I’m an independent bitch.

So on the Tuesday night he came round, I have to say looking knackered, like hanging knackered, I ask did you have a heavy night? No been plumbing again today for K….. He was hanging.

Taking a couple of days out and looking back. What the heck!! Where’s the respect and loyalty? Yeah I can’t spell but common sence, hello I’m not stupid. We didn’t talk for a few days, saying that we don’t talk we text. Upper hand there!!!!

I took a couple of days out, deactivate my Facebook account and looked inside. My god I love this guy, but why did he feel the need to tell me about the beautiful relationships he has had, and how he left them in a better place than’ when he met them!!

Sad as it may seem, i YouTubed, is it ok for opposite sexes to beΒ best friend whilst in a relationship.

Well fuck me, I wasn’t going mad!! NO it’s not, and that wasn’t an ex opposite friend!!

All of a sudden I remember Christmas Eve, “but really Christmas is for family” he says, trying to manipulate me, we go to another pub we’ve never Been to before, guess who walks in??? Yep

I left it and just asked his cousin where he would like to go? So we take a mile walk up the road to our local.

I’m a little loss now, finished my bottle, oops but where do people get off purposely hurting people!!!

Any way a week off Facebook and nearly a week of know contact, I asked to pop round, plan was I’ve looked inside and listen again to my heart, asked very close people to me could you deal with their ex being their best friend even YouTubed it.

I go round he agrees it’s the correct thing to split, NO FIGHT” trying so hard to listen to my self, I did it, what hurt was, he agreed. He reckoned he told me from the start she was his ex!!! He told me Christmas just gone, had he told me when he said we would’nt of got past three months.

I’m really gutted, maybe because it would of been a fairytale but more because, I believed in him & trusted him.

I WILL NOT LOOSE FAITH!!! It’s all I know πŸ’› sorry humans, but any advice willing to receive xx


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